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Then there is the unavoidable fact that Styles has a history of dating elder women, including his current girlfriend, director Olivia Wilde, a 38-year-old mother of two children. “It says that a 28-year-old could still look at a woman near her 40s and think, hotness,” Cataudella says. Fans who found Styles later in life, exactly when they—we—needed him, have also found each other. As Tiffany submits, paraphrasing the book Superfandom by Aaron M. Glazer and Zoe Fraade-Blanar, “true fandom rarely persists on its own.” The communal experience of Styles adoration is a near-daily source of joy for me and a growing number of mutually obsessed friends (on several text chains) who joke about the relentless charms of Styles content, from magazine covers, shoots, and film trailers to Pleasing launches and custom Gucci concert looks. There is no rest for the fandom (“He wants us dead,” a friend recently quipped), but “it’s my opinion we are bonded for life because of this man,” Liberty says.
“After learning that ‘Watermelon Sugar’ was about oral sex, I thought to myself, Wow. He genuinely loves women,” Katy, a newly minted 42-year-old Styles fan, tells me. “He’s got such a hold on women. It’s totally like Elvis.” With singles like “What Makes You Beautiful,” “the proposition of One Direction was always that they were in celebration of girls and women,” Kaitlyn Tiffany, author of Everything I Need I Get From You: How Fangirls Created the Internet as We Know It, explains. As a solo artist with female-worshipping songs like “She,” “Woman,” “Adore You,” and “Boyfriends”—plus comments about how female fans are the driving force of his popularity—“he’s really taken the subtext of that band and made it the primary text of his solo career,” she adds.
In a recent conversation with a group of mom friends in their 40s, she found that almost all have obsessions akin to her own with Styles but trained on the likes of Nick Cave or Machine Gun Kelly. “The one who doesn’t have a muse said that she wants to find one because she feels like she’s missing out on something, and I had to say that she is,” Liberty says. “It’s a form of escapism, sure, but it can also bring you out of the darkest of holes when you need it most.” Cataudella regularly connects with fellow Harries through a private Facebook group for fans, even meeting up with members at concerts around the world. “We all know exactly how we feel, and we’re not judging each other for it,” she says. “We’re in the town square giggling together.”
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